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Wellies ......

You can't have too many Willies.
Or Wellies. Polypropylene for driving in and a certain panache in the pub. Steeel bottoms and toe for everything else.
I had new floorboards laid in a cave. Walking over the debris in unsuitable Wellies, I trod on a plank carelessly cast aside.
A protruding 6" nail Ouch.
Passing right through my Willey from tip to bottom. Protruding through the top of my foot. Walking with the plank attached slap slap slap falling over. Not too much pain until standing on one foot I pulled off, forcing the rusty 6" back through the soul of my foot. STIGMATA.
The bruising and pain Strewth!!

With the hole carelessly shot right through my left palm and the hole in my left foot, Stigmata. In Italy one year visiting a Cathedral in Milan, in my flip flops, I showed my palm and left foot off to a Nun for a laugh.
They crossed themselves for fear!!!!
The Ancient Mariner.
 
Yes, If this offends let me amend.
I usually do reconsider and amend later in favour of good taste.
What can I say, which part offends. Genuinely I understand there are boundaries.
I did shoot myself years ago. A .22 Magnum Long placing my hand over the barrel end and I did pierce my foot with a nail and I do have arguably symbolic injuries.
My foot really hurt from the top to the bottom.
Thanks for the tip though.

I get it Willy. I call myself WillIy for Wiliam Tell.
It was my dog that was called Willie.
 

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I guess predictive typing has some sort of learning algorithm (artificial stupidity, certainly not AI) which can lead to some pretty funny mistakes
 
Just picked mine up from the local drop off at the co-op. They’re light and comfortable, ideal for dog walking and for the money I’m very pleased with them but they’re obviously seconds with some messy glue and some colour variations….still, they won’t stay clean long enough for anyone to be able to tell.
 
I like those Wellies.
I go for polypropylene I have a matching jacket too.
 
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